Find Your Happiness

We use resilience not to overcome the stress in our lives but to achieve something greater…happiness. It is the sense of a satisfying and rewarding life we strive for and our ability to be resilient with stress moves us closer to finding joy. Researchers talk about three kinds of happiness that we can experience in our lives. These include: Moment to moment happiness that relates to the small pleasures we encounter each day. A blooming flower or an acknowledging word for a job well done. Small events that, if we allow, can bring a smile to our face. Success in our day translates to a job well done. We set out on a path to get a certain amount accomplished Read More

The Conflict Resilient Workplace

Conflict is inevitable but the suffering and inefficiencies that accompany it in the workplace are optional. A recent survey of workplace stressors pointed out that conflict with co-workers is one of the leading sources of distress and lost productivity. Consider the time wasted with unresolved workplace problems and the gossip, frustration, and potential retribution that accompany conflict among your workplace colleagues. Developing a conflict resilient workplace means that you and your team have an effective process for recognizing and addressing conflict and even looks for the opportunities to use the tension associated with the disagreement as an opportunity for constructive resolution. Here are some ideas to look for in building a workplace that is uses conflict as a source of Read More

Relationship Ratios

With Valentine’s Day just a few days away, it makes sense to remind ourselves that our relationships are a primary way to build our resilience. Having your best bud around to talk about, reflect and problem solve our daily and life challenges keeps us in balance and out ahead of the storms. A key measure that you can keep in mind for our partnerships is 5:1. Providing your partner 5 positive statements to every negative statement will help insure that your relationship stays on track. According to research done by psychologists John and Julie Gottman, healthy relationships that maintain that ratio on a regular basis are stronger, last longer and are happier. Affirming statements could include: Sharing small appreciations. Expressing Read More

Watch Your Language

I was coaching a senior leader who’s been working on decreasing his tendency to micromanage his employees. He’s been making good progress but he received some feedback from his team that he was, once again, directing their day-to-day activities and failing to give them the freedom and opportunity to run their own projects. “Sometimes I am my own worst enemy” he told me in our coaching session. “I just always think I have to make sure everything gets taken care of and the only way I know to do that is to take over.” he exclaimed to me with an air of frustration. I suggested to him that he could rethink how he conceptualizes this problem and could definitely change Read More